There comes a point in your life when you realize that the old way is no longer working. The old way of allowing others to dictate what you say or do for the fear of standing up for yourself or people that you care about walking out of your life. Enough is enough. Take back your power and do the hard things that will lead to peace of mind.
I want to help you on this journey of happiness with discovering your true power and aligning to God’s perfect will for your life. Here are some helpful ways to empower you and help you to stand up for yourself, speak in the boldness of Christ, and aid in your peace of mind.
Know That The Battle Is Not Yours to Fight
You have the right to choose what you entertain and what conversations you choose to be a part of. If you know that you would more and likely not like your peace disrupted by engaging in a certain conversation, choose to say no. When you say no, let it be no, don’t go back on your word. Stand firm on your decision.
Express Your Needs
Don’t put your attention on what others are doing, but reflect on what you need. You have to know that you are valuable and your needs are important. Know what makes you joyful, secure, and valued. When you begin to communicate your needs, communicate with clarity. Start your sentences with I. For example, I hear your concerns, but I need or I would like.. These are examples that can be used to start.
Take A Deep Breath
When it comes to discussing sensitive topics, and it is your turn to speak. Speak with assertiveness, try to stay away from saying uhm at the beginning of your sentence. Take a deep breath, gather your thoughts, and begin to express your side of things.
Decide The Course of The Conversation
If you are discussing something with someone and the conversation is not going in a good direction. You can state, “I don’t like the direction this conversation is going, let’s try to move in a better direction.” This is an example to take back control of the conversation from spiraling into an argument.
Hear The Other Person
It is easy to want to interrupt someone when you know everything they are throwing at you is false or insulting. Let them finish their statements and don’t put fire on fire by throwing insults back. You can state, “I hear you, what could I have done better or I get it.” Keep your response short acknowledging that you are listening and you hear them even if you don’t understand their point.
Don’t Feed On Negative Words
If you are in the midst of a conversation, and the person is calling you names or insulting you. I want you to imagine every negative word that they are throwing at you falling to the ground to die. Do not choose to carry those words, do not pick them up, let them die. If something that is said is triggering to you, let it fall and in your meditation time pray and ask God to reveal to you why you felt the way you did when those words were spoken.
I have found these tips very helpful when standing up for myself and allowing God to be my shield and buckler. I’m reminded of the verse in Proverbs 17:27-28, “He that hath knowledge spareth his words; and a man of understanding is of an excellent spirit. Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise; and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.”
Not everyone or every situation warrants a response from you. A person who can hold their tongue and hold their peace is a person of great strength. The knowing that God is fighting for me and nothing is hidden from his sight, that anything a person sows they shall reap. Hold your peace, hold fast to God’s strength. Be bold, stand up and stand firm on God’s word. Be blessed.